I sent M a text message around 10 AM…
“wish I could see you..it will be so hard to be so close to you and be working”
“I know…too bad. Nice to know you are so close though- don’t feel too bad, we are seeing each other very soon.”
“Not soon enough..”
“True..call me once your plane lands anyway.”
It was an overnight last minute trip and part of my orientation for my new position….the trip put me close to where M lives and I was pretty sad it was so last minute we hadn’t been able to make arrangements to see each other. Like he said, my only consolation was that we were going to be seeing each other in a few weeks. I was looking forward to seeing Texas again but distracted and a little heavy hearted that we wouldn’t cross paths.
I called him as soon as I arrived and we chatted for about an hour as I waited for my rental car at the airport and drove myself to my hotel. He sounded so close and I felt giddy knowing I was that close to him. When we got off the phone I checked in to my hotel and left again to go to a meeting that had been set up for me.
It was interesting enough to distract me for the few hours that it lasted but when I left the convention center and turned my phone back on I had a text from M.
“Just wanted to say hello….what time are you done?”
“Now Sir, I just stepped out and am headed back to my room”
His next text:
“Good girl, go back to your hotel and wait for me. I’m on my way over.”
I couldn’t believe it…OK, I could…it actually would have shocked me had M not arranged to spend some time with me…it turned out he took the next day off of work and was actually planning on spending the night with me. So I was a happy pet! He told me to tell the front desk that he would be joining me and that they were to give him an entry card when he arrived.
The next text message told me that he wanted me naked- except for my collar. I was to stand in the corner and wait for him. I couldn’t get back to my hotel fast enough! I was so excited as I removed my clothing. I took a quick shower and dried my hair as fast as I could so I would be ready when he got there. The room was chilly when I left the warmth of the humid bathroom so I grabbed the hotel robe that was at least two sizes too big and pulled it on. As I crossed over from the sitting room of the suite into the sleeping area I saw M sitting on the bed. My initial reaction was of supreme joy to be with him again, it had been several weeks since we had seen each other and I fought the urge to just throw myself in his arms for a huge hug. The look on his face stopped me and I realized right away that he was upset. It must have appeared to him that I was disregarding his instructions when in actuality I was just unsure when he would be there, I had been traveling all morning and then that long meeting…I needed to shower. I started to explain as he crossed the room towards me.
He was holding my cell phone and it was opened. He handed it to me and told me to read the message. It was the message he had sent telling me to go back to my room, remove my clothing and wait for him in the corner.
“Read it out loud.” he said. I did with a quiet shaky voice. I looked up at him and handed him back the phone.
“I just wanted to be sure that my instructions weren’t confusing or vague, they weren’t, were they?”
“No, Sir but…”
“Don’t.” he tossed the phone back onto the dresser and stepped closer to me. He stood in front of me and started to untie the belt of my thick robe. The white terry cloth opened easy and using the sides of the robe he pulled me against him for a moment before stepping away and pushing the robe down off of my shoulders.
“You were to come back here immediately, remove your clothing and wait for me in the corner. Instead you came back after stopping at Starbucks..(sigh…he noticed the cup) to shower and primp for half an hour while I sat out here and waited for you.”
“I didn’t know you were here Sir.”
He closed his eyes as if he was searching for patience and I kicked myself for opening my mouth.
‘We don’t see each other as often as either one of us would like, we certainly do not see each other as often as you apparently need. When we do have a chance to see each other your actions make it so I must discipline you instead of doing something more pleasurable for us both.”
As he lectured me his fingers had found my nipples and were pulling and pinching each one until I felt as if I couldn’t take it any longer. As he did his eyes never left mine as if daring me to ask him to stop. I wanted to close my eyes and let the pain sweep me away but his lecturing me kept me right in the here and now and it was impossible to get away.
Abruptly he let go of me and with a nod in the direction of the corner he told me to go there and stand. I turned and walked quickly away from him wanting to be unmindful of my nakedness but wasn’t quite there yet. I felt embarrassed and humiliated as I stood facing the wall. He told me that I was his and should obey him at all times. I knew all this of course and it kinda sunk in that I had really screwed up. He said that after all this time the fact I deliberately chose to disobey him told him that he had been too easy on me in the past and he was going to make it up to me this evening. I felt unnerved and a little challenged because I had yet to see the welcoming tenderness in his eyes that I had always been able to find, especially when it had been awhile since our last visit. That hurt. But so did the fact that I knew he was right, I rolled my eyes to myself feeling really stupid that I was unable to follow his simple instructions. How I loved to please him…and to have thrown away an opportunity made me really very sad. I would love to have the chance to do it all again, to come straight back to my room and do exactly as he requested. Then I’d most likely by now be happily over his knee receiving an entirely different type of spanking than what he would be doing to me in a few minutes. I was as close to tears as he had ever had me and he had yet to touch me. These were the thoughts running through my mind as I stood quietly in the corner. He grew quiet but I could feel his eyes on me and I could almost feel his decisiveness, as if he knew exactly what he was going to do to me but had decided to make me continue to stand in the corner a bit longer. I hate the corner, the vulnerability of standing naked against the wall my back to him my hands on my head. It always makes me feel more helpless than even being beaten by him or held down or tied down. Maybe because I can’t see him or maybe because ‘standing in the corner’ has a such a naughty girl connotation to it. It is always bad but with him truly being disappointed in me it was much worse.
I heard him sit down on the bed and a moment later he called me to him. I walked over to where he sat. I had my hands folded in front of me and looked at them instead of at him. I knew he could tell I was sorry even though he hadn’t given me permission to speak. I felt a change in him and I knew he wasn’t angry at me any longer. I knew I would still be punished for what I had done but that it wouldn’t be with anger when he touched me. He pulled me closer so I stood between his legs. He told me to look at him but I knew if I did I would start crying. He said my name and again told me to look at him. I did and somehow managed to hold it together. He told me I could speak and my apology gushed out and I told him that I just wanted to be ready for him but I knew I should have followed his instructions, that I was sorry, so sorry I had disappointed him and that I knew he should punish me, that I deserved whatever punishment he decided I needed. I was truly sorry and I think he could tell. I hadn’t noticed before but beside him on the bed was my collar and when I finshed speaking he put it around my neck.
“Twenty four.” he said as he buckled it. “I sat here and waited for you for twenty four minutes while you finished your shower and dried your hair. So to be fair you will receive twenty four strokes of the cane. Twelve now and then you will return to the corner where you will stand for twenty four minutes and think about the choices you made. After that you will receive the other twelve strokes. Now, go bring me my cane.” He motioned over to the overnight bag he had with him.
As I did he stood and walked over towards the wooden corner desk. I handed him the cane not wanting to beleive I was truly going to receive 24 strokes. It was even more than what he had given me when I was in Austin with him last. He stepped back allowing me to walk past him to lay my chest across the cool mahogany of the desk. I felt nervous and a little sick to my stomach because I knew this was going to hurt. I felt his hand press into my lower back and I lifted my bottom slightly to show him I was ready. My last pain free thought was that it was odd my tolerance for pain changes when I know I am being punished as opposed to being caned or spanked for his amusement or sexual pleasure. Somehow that makes a shift in my head that changes the whole experience for me. It hurts more because maybe I know it should, it makes me feel less the way I like to feel and gives me more of that feeling that I don’t like, the one that has nothing to do with pain or sex or D/s…the feeling that I did something wrong. It is a humbling yet powerful feeling to know that you can admit to needing discipline and then have the courage to take it.