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Dancing with pixie

Today, pixie and I were online chatting, and as always the conversation drifted toward Liam and Richard and pixie and where it was all going, and how we feel about each other, and what we say to each other about how we feel, and what a worrier I am, and finally pixie said, “It’s like dancing.” I replied “um….yes? How is it like dancing?” She replied:

“cause there is only one reason why people do it…and it is the same reason people love it. it feels good, it moves you inside, the music it takes to move sometimes can make you laugh or sing or even cry but it always, always feels good. i sometimes dance alone, even in the dark where no one can see me or laugh or judge or watch. it feels good so i do it, i love it. it doesn’t help me tomorrow or next month or even next year but it moves me today. that’s how i see you in my life. you move me inside.”

That stopped me in my tracks. “It doesn’t help me tomorrow or next month or even next year but it moves me today. that’s how i see you in my life. you move me inside.” I just didn’t know what to say to that. These sentences made me feel like I was actually listening to music. I shared some music with pixie recently that I described as “achingly beautiful.” You know, there are only a few notes, everyone has the same notes to work with, and yet one person arranged these notes is such a way that anyone who heard it would feel this ache. The music makes you ache inside at the beauty of it. That is how these words made me feel. Not sad, she didn’t arrange these words so that I was sad. But nonetheless, they are achingly beautiful. I have been moved inside. And pixie, I will dance with you any day.

3 thoughts on “Dancing with pixie

  1. Richard- you must love pixie very much. funny how so much remains unsaid yet it is so obvious. she expressed her feelings for you beautifully in her description of her dance. i love how you both are able to be so open on this blog. the two of you together must be really something to see. i like your description of achingly beautiful. rarely words can touch my heart and i am happy that pixie was able to touch yours.

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