She was beautiful. You could tell with a glance that she knew others found her lovely. Yet she wasn’t haughty or arrogant like so many beautiful women. She carried herself with an elegant confidence that made her even more breathtaking. I liked her right away. I liked how she smiled and I liked how she smelled. I realized for the first time I was finding another woman attractive. I was always the kind of girl who appreciated beauty in other women. Not so much women as a sexual being but as an object of beauty. I see beauty in almost all women in one way or the other, I see beauty in myself. It is the softness of our skin, the lilt of our voices, the tilting of our chins and the nodding of our heads…all uniquely feminine. All utterly lovely. She was the first woman I had ever met that made me feel desire. She made me wonder what it would be like to be her focus, to have her hands on me. To be tasted. Briefly the thoughts scared me, briefly I wondered why my mind was dancing around what was only before an appreciation of grace and beauty. It hit me quickly that my desire was not unlike the desire I felt for a man. A longing to be taken…a desire to serve and provide pleasure. I sensed a quiet dominance in her when we spoke, when she looked at me it was in her eyes. Maybe she didn’t even know it was there. I couldn’t tell if she knew. I could tell she was submissive to her handsome husband however and I was charmed by the way she blushed so prettily when he threatened to spank her. Maybe I only recognized it because I am intensely submissive, maybe I knew it because she somehow made me feel very young, almost vulnerable. I liked how she made me feel. I liked how I wanted to stand next to her and I liked how it felt when she held my hands. I sensed she was nervous but not lacking in confidence and that told me a lot about her. Our meeting was only awkward for the few moments that it took me to relax into her. It was a hard scene for me, made even harder by their presence in the small room. I had worried for weeks what it would be like to submit to M in front of someone else. I so badly wanted to please him so I stepped into the situation with more confidence than I actually had. I have already written an accounting of this experience https://pixiepie.wordpress.com/2007/03/07/his/ So I won’t go into too many details. As I read through my own words it was apparent that I tried very much to down play the effect she had on me. I was more wrapped up in describing my submission to M and my humiliation at being made to submit in front of his friends.Looking back what made that brief meeting with her and her husband was not my heightened submission and it wasn’t my desperate need to please M. It was that I had somehow been pulled inside the intimate circle of two very loving people. I liked that feeling of vulnerability that came with having her touch me…with having him touch me. I knew at that moment it was something that one day I hoped to experience more of. I think that is one reason why I was so eager when M put Ms. Anna in my life. I longed for that type of interaction since that Texas afternoon so long ago. Of course Ms. Anna wasn’t the one, my experiences with her were way more emotional and less of a physical nature. Yet it was certainly a catalyst for making me long for the day when I could in truth be dominated by another woman. I have this innate desire to please. I am attracted to Dominate personalities. Though with her it was different, it wasn’t so much the Dominance in her I found exciting as much as it was the physical reactions my body had when she touched me. Her dominance added to it because I longed to explore that…yet I realized we were both submissive by nature. I could never dominate another person….I think there must be two very different types of submissives. I could submit to her, I imagine it. I imagine pleasing her and bringing her additional pleasure by pleasing her Dominant. With an open mind there are no limits to consensual discovery.
I am not sure why I am writing about all this now..when so many other events are transpiring around me. Only that it is on my mind and my lovely friends have recently come back into my life. I’ve missed you both. 🙂