I am quickly leaving my readers with an update before I head out. I am in the mood to dance tonight so that is where I am headed. Sometimes you just have to dance….
Richard told his wife about me.
Just so I do not have to continually call her ‘his wife’ or ‘his spouse’ I will from now on call her ‘L’.
L knows about me.
She knows what I am to Richard and knows pretty much everything we have been doing for the past seven months. I have had limited contact with Richard this weekend. But I received a telephone call from him that started with…”I am sitting here on the couch with L and I needed you to know I am alright…” I feel oddly discontented knowing he was calling me with his wife by his side. Even as we first started to discuss the possibility of him telling L about me I wondered how he would act towards me if ever he had me in the same room with her. I could never stand coldness form him….it would break something inside of me. So when his voice still gentled when he spoke to me I was pleased…he was kind and reassuring and said that we would talk later. He said everything was alright. He asked if I was alright…if I was in bed, he said my voice sounded as if I was in bed. I told him I was. I was wearing his shirt only I didn’t tell him that.
A later text message told me that he was educating her about his needs and mine. I am torn about this. Part of me, a large part of me is amazed..I can’t believe that she knows of my existence. That she is allowing Richard to keep me. All of a sudden I feel more settled in my role as his pet. Is there anything wrong with what we are doing now that it is out in the open? I know it will be a process as she accepts it. I know that it will be slow and that I will have to be sensitive to that. Or maybe that is not my responsibility…I suppose my focus and my main responsibility is still just doing as I am told. Meeting my Owners needs and following his need as I support him through this.
Always, always he thinks of me and he knew I was sick with worry about how his evening was going. I was thrilled when he contacted me. His voice sounded strong…lighter somehow like he had just walked through the worst kind of hell and the other side wasn’t near as bad as what he expected. He said that she asked him to not have contact with me until the two of them figure things out…he refused. He told her that I am a submissive..I need to be connected to him. I think it will take awhile before she understands what submission means..what Dominance means. I know she has started to research the two.
She is allowing him to keep me. I imagine there will be some restrictions. I imagine Richard will choose his battles. His voice sounded lighter for as much as he hated hurting her keeping it from her was harder.
Tonight even as I head out on a (friend) date..I feel Owned. It feels different somehow and I am not sure totally why. Maybe being the ‘secret’ he carried was weighing on me…maybe I felt the weight of it coming from him. Maybe now I just know that the hard part is not really over but we are headed to what may be an easier part of this journey.
It says a lot about her that she is willing to allow this. It is mature and commendable. I am proud of Richard for having the courage to shake it up and throw it all on the table. I meant that much to him. Saving his marriage meant that much to him. There is a possibility that he may be one of the few individuals who could quite possibly have his cake and eat it too.
I know that Richard and I have a long time together now. I will be his until I feel the need to move on or until keeping me is too difficult for him. I think he will still be supportive of me in my efforts to find Mr. Right though I certainly do not feel the need to do that. I am not dating right now per his request and I am fine with that. I need to focus my efforts right now on getting my submission back to where it was…to let go of all of the negative residual feelings that have sort of collected at the base of it for the past few weeks. My goal will be working on myself…feeling good about myself and where I am with my Owner. I need to patiently wait and see how L knowing about me will change Richard’s availability to me. I wonder if she will want to meet me. Of course I will do as I am told…I wonder so many things. I wonder if it is appealing to her to see her Dominant husband in action with his little pet…..I do not know how sexually adventurous she is but she has been married to one of the most sensual men I have ever known longer than the entirety of my life.
Thank you for listening….for commenting..for not being mean to me as I try to explain where I am in all this. I offer a lot to be judged and rarely do I get that. Thank you for your concern about Richard…for your well wishes. I love him, you know..I want him happy. My gift to you is the promise to keep you in the know…as I work on increasing my level of submission to my Owner I will take you with me on my journey. I have a feeling a new path is opening up.