“There is a lot that I still want to do to you, you know that don’t you?” He asked me as we said goodbye. He was standing in front of me and was holding my hands behind my back. My wrists were loose in his grasp. He doesn’t need to hold on tight to me to remind me I am owned. I could feel his warmth seep through my clothes and I leaned into him wanting more and more of his words. Needing more….just like I always do when he holds me like that. I fought the urge to lean in a bit more to tilt my head so my forehead would rest beneath his heart.
“Yes Sir.” I whispered looking up at him instead. I was curious. “Like what? Come on Sir, tell me? There can’t be too much that you haven’t made me do.” He chuckled but reaffirmed that there was in fact many things he still wanted and planned on doing to me.
I suppose he is right. There is more. I see it there behind his eyes sometimes as if he wants to push me further, hit me harder, and tie me tighter, longer. I know there is more, I want more.
I walked away though feeling a little disconcerted as if his words were meant to be a warning. I found that they lingered with me through the night. Sometimes when I am in my bed I think of him and the things he has done to me. I think about where he has taken me and how my submission has grown. It is so real to me now, like it never was before when I could pretend what I had was enough.
I think about the things he whispers to me, what he makes me say and how his very words can change my mood in an instant. I often wonder if he knows the effect his remarks have on me. I imagine he does and it is just another method he has of holding me close to him when we can’t be together every day. I am not sure what I was I worried about when the one evening a week/one lunch together a week agreement was sort of handed down. I realize now it is not too different than what we had settled into on our own. With both of us having lives, other relationships and careers we must focus on…. this limit has been one that I am somewhat supporting. Maybe I have a love/hate relationship with it. Of course I only say it resembles love when my need has been sated and I am not craving what it is he does to me.
Our afternoon was planned and I knew what time he expected me at the apartment. I was expecting to be nervous, I always am before seeing him. I was expecting to feel the anticipation…..you know that feeling of the unknown. It is always like that. There is never a pattern…I really never know what to expect from him. I only know the constants stable me. He expects instant obedience, deference and a willingness to trust him. These things never shift.
About two hours before I was to meet him he sent me a text message.
“Good Afternoon my little pet. I want you to go the apartment RIGHT now.”
Oh…I thought a little unsure. It wasn’t like him to change plans. Luckily, I was able to slip away and went to the apartment within ten minutes of his call. I let myself in and on the bed was a small box. Inside the box was a pair of nipple clips. They were endurance clips, the Japanese clover kind that tighten when pulled. They felt scary in my hand, sort of heavy. I took a deep breath and felt a little dizzy because I knew there would be pain tonight. He knew I needed it and lately he has given me plenty. Funny how it stabilizes my mind if I am emotionally steadied at the conclusion…funny how it all works. Will I ever figure it all out?
There was more in the box. A butt plug, larger than the one I had. Much larger. It was pale pink and felt silky in my hand. I thought back to my smaller plug and the frustration he felt with it….he called it a toy and embarrassed me with it because I wasn’t able to hold it inside myself. I hated it because of it’s slimness and imagined it being inside me and Richard making me cum only to have the little torpedo shoot out and put his eye out. Like on the Christmas Story…you know that annoying movie that is on for 24 hours every Christmas. “You’ll shoot your eye out…lol.” It always makes me laugh to think of that.
Anyway…this plug was much, much bigger. I dropped it beside the nipple clamps on the bed. There was also a note that said to use my Bluetooth and call him. My hands shook a little as I dialed his number on my cell before snapping it closed and adjusting the small earpiece to take the call.
A moment later his voice surrounded me. No greeting today, no how are you..…just him being HIM.
“Remove all your clothing- I want you naked like the little slut that you are… quickly take them off.” I hurried and slipped out of my pants and pulled my sweater over my head. I wore dark blue boy shorts that were entirely made of lace and a matching bra. I quickly removed them too liking the feel of the warm air against my skin. We keep the apartment warm because I can’t stand the cold.
“Pull at your nipples, thats right. Pull them hard. I want to hear your breathing change. Get them hard and aching for me. Are they still sore from the other night?“ I knew what he meant. The other night he had taken my entire breast into his mouth and bit it. The ring of teeth marks are still embedded into my skin. I allowed my fingers to brush over the marks. I fumbled through removing my clothing…trying hard to answer him without my voice fading into that little girl voice I get when he Doms me over the phone. The one that makes him tease me.
“I want the clips on your nipples. First one and then stop…then tell me it’s done.” I did.
“Alright now tell me what a cunt you are, tell me you are my cunt.” I struggled only briefly.
“I am your cunt Sir.” He was quiet for a second as if registering my words and then he told me to put the second clamp on. Again, he told me to tell him when it was on.
“It’s on Sir.”
“Do they hurt?”
“Yes Sir…a little” They were tight but not unbearably tight.
“Pull them, pull the little chain. Pretend it’s me and I am leading you around like my little pet.” I pulled the chain just a little.
“Pull it harder.” He said into my ear as if he knew somehow my reluctance. I pulled them harder and the metal bit deeply into my nipples and I cried out sharply and the noise ended with a moan as my body grabbed onto the pain and flipped it like it can somehow magically do into something so much sweeter.
He asked if I was on my knees. I whispered “Yes Sir” as I sunk down beside the bed. He told me to crawl across the room and back letting the chain drag the floor, the weight of it tugging and torturing my nipples.
“Climb up on the bed and get on your hands and knees cunt. You are going to plug your ass for me, you are going to get your little asshole ready so when I get there I can just fuck it hard. Do you understand?”
“Yes Sir..” I answered him pulling myself up on the bed and getting in to the position.
“Once more slut, pull on the chain for me. Make it hurt.” I pulled and the pain again charged through me, whitened and then spread out into a soft glow.
“Get your plug…look at it. It’s bigger isn’t it? Don’t worry, my slut can take it. Rub it all around in your cunt juice, get it good and wet because that’s all the lube you are getting.” I moaned in protest and he threatened to make me put it in dry so I assured him my cunt juice would be sufficient. I rubbed the rubbery heavy plug around my cunt wishing it was porous somehow and capable of soaking up a little of my juice to aid in the insertion process. This plug was actually much bigger than my first one and I was afraid of it. I tried to tell him and he told me to be quiet, he asked since when was this about pleasing me. He reminded me that my ass was his and he would say what went in it and when. “Now…is it all wet? Look at your plug is it wet?”
“It is wet Sir.”
“I want it wetter slut, suck on it for me. Taste your slutty cunt juices for your Owner. Suck on the plug, NOW…I want to hear you.” Red humiliation flashed across me and I closed my eyes hoping to block out his words. I knew even as I struggled I would obey him. I went with the eager slut who yearned to please him and ignored that whispered voice, the softer voice that sometimes speaks.I held it between my hands and let my mouth slide down around the large plug. It was as large as a cock and it tasted funny in my mouth. I heard him in my ear…
”Stop sucking. Just hold it in your mouth. Close your eyes and focus on your mouth being full of my cock. Feel how open your ass and cunt feel right now. I bet you wish they were both full, don’t you? Don’t you? Oh that’s right….my little slut can’t answer, her mouth is full of cunt covered butt plug. Maybe one day I will fuck your ass while you ride someone else’s cock. You would like that. You would like three cocks, wouldn’t you? A cock in each of your holes.” I felt humiliated tears on my face as I held the plug in my mouth, I remembered my aching nipples and I moaned against the plug. I felt a trickle of my juice on my thigh and realized I was dripping wet for him. Even through his humiliating words I wanted him, I wanted this.
“Good girl. I want it in your ass now. Slip it into your cunt for me once just to make sure it is wet enough and then when I tell you stick it deep in your ass.”I positioned the plug right at my hole and paused for his instruction.
“Tell me what you are doing.”
“I am kneeling Sir. My nipples are clamped and they really, really hurt. I have my legs open and the plug is right there.” I knew that wasn’t good enough.
“Right where?” I swallowed hard and my voice was barely a whisper. He could hear me though.
“There….I mean here, right here, back there.”
“You mean it’s against your slutty little asshole?” I cringed.
“yes Sir.” My voice was quiet.“Then say that, tell me.”
“I am holding the plug against my slutty little asshole.”
“Good girl. Ask me if you can plug your ass.”
I took a deep breath…not really a struggle because the words were out of my mouth before I could really even think. Saying what he wants me to say is automatic now. What made it hard was that he wasn’t there. He was twenty minutes up the highway sitting in his office in a huge building. I said it and again he praised me. He told me to do it.
“Push it in, plug yourself for your Owner.” I pushed it in and felt myself stretch to take the larger plug.
“It’s in Sir. It is hard to take, it feels heavy and I it is stretching me more than I like. It hurts.”
“Good. Now, get up and get dressed. Do the best you can leaving the plug in place. Leave the nipple clips on too. Go back to work, finish up and be back in an hour. I’ll be there when you do.”